Tag Archives: guest

Princess Anne, a posh prat, polar bears, and perfume preferences (Rousse)

We’d all worked hard on the show for months. Even S played an active role, kindly agreeing to deliver the opening address. I did wonder, however, if she now regretted this offer given the fuss that I was making over … Continue reading

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The Emperor of China, Tom Forrest, an absent wife, and a widower (Rousse)

Ancient tradition in China required the donning of a long black robe (similar to an academic gown) whenever the emperor visited. Every day during my imprisonment I was on standby for this eventuality. Meanwhile I joined in with the activities … Continue reading

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Murderer serves lunch to transsexual surprise guest feet away from victim’s remains in biscuit tin (Rousse)

I planned X’s murder to coincide with his holiday. That way nobody would miss him when he didn’t turn up to work. While I deliberated over where to dump his body parts, I kept them in a small round red … Continue reading

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A dead grandmother, a muscular tramp, and a lost wallet (Rousse)

I spent the night before the dinner at my Granny T’s house. She was looking remarkably well – and indeed fashionable – for someone who had been dead for twenty years. On the evening of the big event itself I … Continue reading

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An audience with James Herriot (Rousse)

When I heard the exciting news that the guest speaker was James Herriot (or, more precisely, James Alfred Wight) I altered my plans so that I could stay a bit longer at Sighthill and meet the famous veterinary surgeon turned … Continue reading

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Hugh Jackman hosts 2020 tech movers and shakers event (Rousse)

TPR and I pulled off the highway and took the first exit into what looked like a garden centre. It turned out to be a massive restaurant for geeks – six years in the future. By 2020 Hugh Jackman was … Continue reading

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A pirate themed wedding (Rousse)

The pirate themed wedding was a great success, although the groom confessed to me in private that he regretted missing the opportunity to show off his magic tricks. My parents enjoyed themselves immensely – even my poor father who was … Continue reading

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