Monthly Archives: December 2011

French homework help (Rousse)

This was shameful. Not only had I little idea of how to correct my nephew PF’s French homework, but I also incorrectly “corrected” the work of another person who had been helping him. Exasperated I confessed my lost talents. “Didn’t … Continue reading

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Jack Dee, school girls in gingham blouses, and dental floss (Rousse)

I couldn’t believe my luck: Jack Dee agreed to coach me for my big lecture in March! In the meantime, there were some more mundane duties to attend to on campus. EH suggested that a couple of glasses of Champagne … Continue reading

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An ex-boyfriend and an X-rated party (Belle)

I attended a business meeting with my heartbreaking ex. While I was on top form, shining with good health and happiness, he was a shadow of his former self. Delighted, I managed to convince him he should escort me to … Continue reading

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Makeup tips for women over 40 (Rousse)

Belle and I happened to be staying at the same conference hotel. I was so excited to see her, keen to take advantage of a rare opportunity to snatch five minutes together alone. I congratulated Belle on her recent Dreamaticus … Continue reading

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Man falls to death from medieval tower: “lost” handbag takes the blame (Rousse)

I found my new Joey D handbag again where I’d left it: sitting in the corner of the lift. It must have been travelling up and down the floors for hours, yet it appeared untouched. I pulled the zip to … Continue reading

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Belle holds down two jobs (Belle)

My life was so pressured I was holding down two jobs. Not only was I a Serie A ballgirl, looking after the away end at Palermo’s ground but I was simultaneously walking through a derelict house trying to assess its … Continue reading

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Rousse sacks her Polish au pair painter

Our Polish au pair girl would have to be let go. Her latest misdemeanour was an uninvited attempt to paint our kitchen walls sky blue. She did this with no regard for the furniture, appliances and pictures all still in … Continue reading

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